


Get What You Want?

by llmarmalade



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-21 00:06:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14272500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/llmarmalade/pseuds/llmarmalade
Summary: Katniss Everdeen has a plan. Get her longtime crush to notice her. When she fails in her attempt she decides to enlist the help of Panem High School's golden boy Peeta Mellark to fake date her and make her crush jealous. When she starts to fall for her fake boyfriend she has to figure out if what she wants is what she needs.





	Get What You Want?

**Author's Note:**

> The idea from this story came from a couple of high school experiences and the usual high school AU fanfiction out there. And a conversation with SavvyLark about demisexuality. Somehow it turned into this. I will warn you that Katniss is a bit OOC in this story. She is living in a present-day setting so she isn't so terrified of relationships and romance. And Everlark shippers, don't worry, this is an Everlark story even if it seems like it isn't. I had the unrequited love thing going on in high school though in my case the guy I liked was more like Peeta than Gale. So parts of this are inspired by that. I remember the whole desperate desire to look "hot" so that guy will notice you. Newsflash, it rarely does work.  
> Edited to Add: I am having major formatting issues with all my writing. I am going to try to fix it but it's driving me crazy.

"But how do I make him notice me?" I sat down beside Johanna on her bed and played with the hem of my t-shirt. Johanna was the girl to go to when you wanted to know how to play sexy. She was two years older than me and knew how to drive guys crazy. We had been friends for years but so far I had avoided her attempts to make me over into something hotter. I wasn't very good at sexy. In fact, I really didn't like it at all. But it was the only way to get him to notice me.  
Gale was mine and I was his and anything else was unthinkable. Well, ok, I had a crush on him and he still thought I was the cute cousin. We weren't actually cousins but we looked alike enough people thought we were. He was two years older than me and we had been friends for years. Recently though he had started hanging out with the older kids. And now that he was in college I saw all the posts on Facebook with the hot blonde girls. And even though I had made a couple of awkward advances he hadn't taken the bait. I was getting a little desperate. Was there something wrong with me? I mean, I knew I wasn't as pretty as Glimmer Williams but I wasn't ugly. I wore glasses, had worn braces, read books, sprouted obscure fandom knowledge and wore a wardrobe of a librarian. Still, my hair was nice and I thought my features weren't that bad. I was flat chested though.  
"Did you try what I told you? The lip bite thing and the smiling and the touching your hair." Johanna answered.  
"Yeah, and it didn't work. He just kinda ignored me. He spent all the night with Cashmere." I sighed remembering how they had spent the whole night making out while I sat there and tried to pretend it didn't bother me. "I even asked if he wanted to dance. But he didn't."  
Johanna winced. Then she sat there for a couple of minutes and said, "Maybe you should make him jealous?"  
I hadn't had a boyfriend. I was scowling and irritating and most people found me scary. I sat alone with my other friend Madge and read books. I hadn't even been kissed. I was almost eighteen and I hadn't been kissed. I wasn't sure about kissing, it seemed a little weird, but people were supposed to enjoy it. "I could try. Maybe once he figures out I'm not a kid he'll be interested."  
"Listen, Katniss. Don't lose yourself trying to get some guy to notice you. I've been there, done that. And it's not worth it."  
I nodded but wasn't particularly paying attention to Johanna's advice. I had a mission. Find some guy who would make me look desirable enough to get Gale to notice me. I thought down the list of boys in my class. Cato? No, he was the kind of guy who carried knives in his pocket to look tough. Marvel? No, he was just plain creepy. Thresh? No, he was Gale's friend and he wasn't the kind to agree to my plan. Peeta? He'd be perfect but he'd never agree. Peeta Mellark was the golden boy of our class. He was class president, debate champ, wrestler and extremely popular. With his golden-haired good looks and bright blue eyes, he looked almost as good looking as Finnick Odair who was a senior and considered to be the hottest boy at Panem High School. Finnick was very much taken though. He only had eyes for Annie Cresta who spent most of her time reading books and swimming. I liked Annie. Her story gave me hope. If Annie Cresta could snag the hottest guy in the senior class I could surely succeed in my mission. But Peeta was also nice. He was the kind of guy who helped old ladies across the street and volunteered to tutor students.  
But what could I offer him? I didn't have a lot of money. I doubted offering to wash his car would do it. And what else could I offer him? Then I remembered something. His last girlfriend was Cashmere. And Cashmere had spent the whole night making out with Gale. If I pretended to get with Peeta it might make Cashmere jealous too. Possible Peeta could get her back. And even if he didn't he would get revenge on her. It wasn't a very nice thing to do but I wasn't known for being nice.  
The next day at school I cornered Peeta in the art room. He was painting a picture of a dandelion. Peeta smiled as I came up to him. "Hey, Katniss."  
"Hi, uhh… that's really pretty." I motioned to the painting.  
"Oh, thanks. I love dandelions." "I was wondering if…" I paused and then tried to gather up my courage. Finally, I blurted out my plan. I stumbled through a lengthy explanation and stared at my feet. I was messing this up so badly.  
"So you want to fake date to get his attention?" Peeta looked confused. "Well yeah, but I thought maybe with Cashmere…" I really regretted doing this. I was crazy to have gone to him. I should have found some guy like Bristel. Not the golden boy of Panem High.  
"Cashmere and I broke up without any hard feelings. But I'll do it." Peeta said.  
"Why?" I didn't understand why he was doing this.  
"Because I don't have a girlfriend so I can do it. And because I certainly don't mind spending time with a pretty girl like you." He grinned at me and I felt myself blush. Nobody had ever called me pretty beside my mother and sister and Madge.  
"But I…" I paused trying to collect my thoughts. I didn't want any feelings involved. Not that I was fooling myself into thinking that he would ever like me.  
"I know. It's not real." He nodded and added, "He's a lucky guy. To have a girl like you interested in him."  
"Oh no," I mumbled. "I'm nothing special."  
"You have no idea, do you? The effect you have." Peeta said softly. I guessed that was one of his motivational speeches. He wanted to make me feel better.  
"So uhh… how do we do this? I've never actually had a boyfriend." I confessed.  
"How about this? I pick you up Saturday night, assure your mother I am not a serial killer and we go see a movie."  
"Great," I replied. My mother would be relieved. She kept asking why I didn't have a boyfriend and why I spent so much time doing things like hunting and not hanging out at malls doing my makeup. She'd like Peeta. He was the kind of boy parents liked. He'd probably go to a great school.  
"It's a date, Everdeen." He winked exaggeratedly making me laugh. Then the bell rang and I ran off to my English class. I knew on Saturday Gale and his friends always went to the movies. He would be sure to see me with Peeta.  
On Saturday Prim helped me find the perfect blouse to go with my nicest pair of jeans. She helped me put a little makeup on and then sat and gave me advice. I was a little scared when my fourteen-year-old sister started talking about kiss proof makeup. But Prim said she read it in a magazine. She was way too young to be kissing boys. Peeta rang the bell and my mom opened the door. She looked him over critically then called, "Katniss, he's here."  
I saw Peeta turn the charm on my mother full force. He asked her how her day was, offered to help take the casserole out of the oven and talked all about the recent debate tournament he was in. By the end of their conversation, my mother was smiling and had lost any suspicion. Prim attacked a plate of cookies Peeta had brought by. I wondered why Peeta had spent so much time and effort on me. I was just a fake girlfriend.  
"So what movie do you want to see?" Peeta asked. I considered for a moment. Gale had talked about seeing Black Panther. And I wanted to see it as well.  
"What about Black Panther?" I suggested.  
Peeta grinned. "You have excellent taste. I was worried you'd want to see some sappy romance."  
"I don't like that kind of thing," I replied.  
"Ahh…well some sappy romances are ok. I draw the line at creepy or rapey." Peeta replied. He hadn't struck me as the romantic kind but now that you thought of it he was the kind who'd cover a girl in chocolate, flowers and make her breakfast.  
"It's just unrealistic. The whole soulmates thing. My parents were like that. And then my dad died. And my mom just lost hope. I don't want that kind of thing. I want something less…intense." I flushed wondering why I was telling him this. I didn't talk about my dad to anyone.  
"My family is the opposite. My parents didn't really love each other. They got married because I guess mom got pregnant. And then they got divorced. I think love exists. It's just most people are selfish."  
The movie was great. I wasn't much for Marvel movies but this one was great. It was nice seeing people who weren't white onscreen. I was one of the few people in Panem that weren't lily white. And I had faced a lot of discrimination growing up. My dad was from Brazil even though he spent most of his childhood in England since his dad was British. That explained why my last name sounded so British. Prim looked so white she could have appeared on a propaganda photo for white nationalism. But she wasn't. I remembered that time she had defended me in a store when a woman was accusing me of shoplifting just because I looked "suspicious". Prim knew more about my dad's roots than I did since she was interested in that sort of thing. But this was Panem and most people thought Trump was great and racial diversity was unnecessary. Perils of living in a small town in the south.  
I saw Gale in the corner with his friends. I was surprised to see Madge sitting next to him. Madge was the mayor's daughter but she was still my friend. I felt a flicker of jealousy as I watched her sitting there. Maybe he liked Madge? She was his type. Blonde, curvy and glamorous. But Madge knew I liked him. Didn't she? Peeta bought me popcorn and sat down beside me. In order to seem more authentic, I leaned my head against his shoulder. I didn't mind it actually. He smelled nice. Like cinnamon and something faintly sweet and spicy. And he was strong. I had never been much for gym rats but Peeta didn't seem like a gym rat even though he must spend a lot of time working out to get this physique. When the movie finished he grabbed my hand and ostentatiously went over to the others to say hi.  
I watched Gale's reaction. He just grinned and gave me a pat on the shoulder. "So you finally got yourself a boyfriend? Don't scare him off with the arrows."  
I rolled my eyes but inwardly felt disappointed. Gale didn't seem to notice my outfit or how I had a boy interested in me. In fact, he seemed just kind of amused and almost happy for me. Madge seemed so excited. She whispered in my ear how great it was that I was dating Peeta. "He's such a great guy. And he's cute too."  
Somehow my disappointment didn't seem as great as I expected. I had just had a nice time. Even though I had failed to make Gale jealous I had watched a great movie. And Peeta was just as nice as Madge said. He was easy to talk to. I found out over the next few weeks that being his "fake girlfriend" had definite perks. He gave me baked goods, posted inspirational posts on my Facebook page, and sat with me and Madge. We sometimes spent hours texting back and forth about books, movies, and TV shows. I talked about how I would probably be spending my first years of college at the community college since like many kids in Panem I couldn't afford the state university. He talked about how he wanted to be an artist but his mom wanted him to get a degree in business.  
We went to see more movies and he took me to Winter Formal. When I posted a picture on my Instagram Gale posted an emoji with a smiling face and wrote, "You two are way too cute." I shut off my phone and tried to sleep.  
It was starting to dawn on me that my plan wasn't really working the way I had intended. Gale and I were no closer than before. I certainly hadn't convinced him to date me. And something else hurt too. I'd grown used to having Peeta Mellark in my life. I wondered what it would be like when we were no longer texting about Star Wars, web series and science fiction novels. I had started to notice how handsome he was. I mean I had noticed before, I'm not blind, but I started noticing and finding it affect me. His eyes were so blue and his eyelashes were golden but very long so they looked like they'd tangle up but they never did. I found him easy going but sometimes he had a toughness that reminded me he didn't win debates or wresting championships by being nice.  
There was one thing I had to try before I fully accepted the fact that my feelings for Gale were unrequited. I needed to show him I wasn't completely innocent. Maybe if I kissed someone else that would show that I wasn't a child anymore. The problem was that I had never been kissed. And I wasn't sure if Peeta would even want to kiss me. Pretending to date and hanging out wasn't unpleasant. In fact, it was fun. But he might draw the line at kissing. I mean, I wasn't anything special and kissing me wouldn't probably be that great. I didn't know what I was doing. That night as we walked by the little lake my father used to take me to fish I blurted out, "Would it like…um.. freak you out to kiss me? Cause I've never been kissed and well…I"  
"Wanted to know what it's like?" Peeta finished. I glanced down at my feet. Yeah, honestly I did. Right now wasn't about making anyone jealous. There was no one around to see. I just wanted to know what this kissing thing was all about. People seemed to like doing it in movies. "Yeah, I'd like to. And well, I was thinking it would be good…practice."  
I saw a shadow pass across his face but he smiled at me. "Ok. Everdeen. You start."  
I lunged forward and pressed my mouth to his. But I completely miscalculated and ended up knocking noses and teeth. I felt red creep across my face in embarrassment. I was hopeless.  
"Ok, well, here. Close your eyes." I closed my eyes feeling the weight of his gaze on my face. "Tilt your face towards me." I tilted my head a few inches. "And here. This is a soft kiss. The kind you can do in public." His lips pressed against mine for just a couple of seconds. His lips were warm and soft. A little warmth seeped into my body. "And?" I asked. That didn't seem like the most spectacular kiss. It was nice but I had expected something a little more…intense. More like the movies. I might be an inexperienced person but that didn't mean I didn't watch R rated movies.  
"This is a real kiss." I felt his mouth descend on mine again. This time he nipped at my bottom lip until I parted my lips a little. Then he sucked my bottom lip into his mouth. His hands found their way into my hair and I pressed myself closer to him. I found myself eager to explore. The warmth was growing inside and seemed to want to find a way to leak out of me somehow. I started running my fingers through his hair. All too soon he pulled away.  
"Was that what you were looking for?" he asked. I nodded. Now that I had discovered I liked kissing him I wanted another one. But probably it had been just a kind gesture on his part once he figured out I was so hopeless at it.  
"Yeah, I" I hesitated and finally said,  
"I really liked it." "And this is how you make out." I sighed in relief when he kissed me again. This time I kept my mouth half open and focused on trying to mirror his actions. Then I felt his tongue press against mine. For a second I was a little grossed out. Then I felt the warmth inside me start burning down my fingers and legs. A moan slid out of my mouth making me blush. This was a little too intense. But I didn't want to pull away. It felt so good. When he kissed the side of my neck I sighed. It didn't matter anymore if all of this was fake.  
"Wow," I whispered when he finally pulled away and grinned at me.  
He gave me another kiss right before I left the car to go into my house. It was much closer to the first type but it still left a smile on my face. My mother saw me and said, "You like that boy?"  
I hesitated to wonder when that had happened. But I still felt obligated to try to complete my plan. And besides, there was no way a popular, handsome boy like Peeta Mellark would ever like an average girl like me. "Yeah, he's nice."  
She laughed and said, "More than nice if that mark on your neck is any indication."  
I had expected her to be mad but I always forgot my mother was pretty modern and cool about things. She believed me when I told her we hadn't done anything more than kiss. I told her I wasn't ready for anything else.  
"That may be true. But I'm not taking any chances. You're going to start taking birth control. It's good to help regulate your periods anyway. I just want you to be safe." My mom had already talked about sex and had encouraged me and Prim to come to her with any questions. So far I hadn't had any need to. I was always surprised at how my mom dealt with this. I didn't think I needed birth control. I was definitely not ready to have sex. But I also knew people who had thought the same thing and had gotten into trouble. So I let her discuss birth control options and all those other embarrassing details.  
The next week I went to Madge's birthday party. Peeta was invited but had to cancel after he got the flu. I went by myself. For some reason, I felt much more confident. I decided that now was the time to confront Gale and ask him if his feelings for me had changed. I sat there and drank soda and played some weird game with Annie. Annie and Finnick were being ridiculously adorable. It almost made me envious. Even though I didn't believe in soulmates I didn't doubt their love.  
I stepped outside and started as I saw two people on the other side of Madge's ridiculously huge pool. Madge and Gale. Kissing heatedly. I felt my stomach drop as I saw Gale draw back and look her in the eyes. It was different than with Cashmere. I knew neither Cashmere or Gale meant anything serious by it. They were just looking to have a good time. But Madge was well…my best friend. And …She was kissing the boy I liked. And of course, it was Madge. Madge who looked perfect with her amazing pale skin, blue eyes, and full figure. Madge with her piano playing and perfectly applied lipstick and intelligence. I felt resentment surge up in me. Madge had known about my feelings. I thought I made them clear enough. I had told her about a year ago I liked Gale. But I hadn't said anything more. And then I started dating Peeta. Of course, I started dating Peeta.  
"Katniss…" I saw her turn and look at me. She looked shocked at my expression.  
Then she pulled away and raced towards me. "Katniss, I thought…"  
"You thought what…" I spit out. All I could think of is how much time I had spent crying over someone who would never like me. Who would like my best friend instead? I remembered what Johanna had said. Belatedly I realized she was right.  
"I thought that you and Peeta. Once you started dating. I mean you weren't going to date someone while liking someone else." Madge looked near tears.  
"It wasn't real. We just pretended to date. I was trying to make him jealous. I told you I liked him. And then you went behind my back to date him." I felt my stomach flip. I glanced up to see Gale was standing near Madge. He looked shocked and almost angry. At me. Shame filtered through me. I was so stupid. Stupid to ever think anyone would really want…me. Ordinary Katniss Everdeen with her weird habits and inability to see things the way they really were.  
"I didn't know, Katniss. How was I supposed to know you were fake dating Peeta. Which was a low blow. Peeta has been crazy about you forever. And you can't see what's right in front of your face." Madge turned and ran into the house.  
I paused trying to digest what she had said. Peeta crazy about me? That was impossible. Then I remembered his kind words when we first started this experiment, all the thoughtful gestures and those melting kisses by the lake. Had I misinterpreted everything? Did he really like me? And what's more, did I like him back?  
"I didn't know, Katniss." I looked up to see Gale looking at me. "I thought you were just joking around. But I guess I've always seen you as the crazy kid sister."  
"I know. I was stupid. I knew it I just hoped…" I trailed off feeling miserably embarrassed and wanting to throw myself in that pool.  
"And Madge is right. Don't throw away something right in front of your face. I know you well enough that you aren't a very good actress. But you and Peeta looked pretty real."  
"I'm sorry. I messed everything up so badly." I sank down on a chair by the pool. Gale handed me a can of Coke and I took a few sips.  
"We all do from time to time. And I know what you mean. Last year I was just determined to have the complete college experience. A few hangovers and bad hookups later I realized that wasn't what I wanted from life. And Madge is one of those people."  
"I'm glad," I whispered.  
"And remember, Catnip," I turned around. "If you break up with Mellark you won't get all those cheese buns you like so much."  
In spite of myself, I laughed. I found Madge and apologized for accusing her of something she hadn't done. I had been the one who was less than forthcoming. I went home and had a good cry over it. I felt a little bit like a fool. Part of me was starting to realize I hadn't been in love at all. I had just been fixated on the only boy who ever paid me any kind of attention. And liking Gale was safe especially since he hadn't returned my feelings. There wasn't anything vulnerable about that. I didn't feel that same mind-numbing warmth that I felt that night at the lake. Admittedly I had only kissed Peeta but I still felt it even when I wasn't kissing him.  
The next day Madge changed her relationship status to "In a relationship" and posted a picture of her and Gale together. I posted a cheerful comment congratulating them. I then sent Peeta a text saying that when he was better I wanted to talk to him. Later that day he replied that he was really sick and probably wouldn't be able to see me for awhile. I forced myself not to worry. Peeta was healthy and strong and even though the flu had been bad this year he was able to fight it off. When I told my mom he was sick she marched off to the deli to get chicken soup and ran it by his family's bakery. I sat there and fought back insecurity.  
Then I went up to the door and saw Mr. Mellark open it. "Katniss, how are you?" he asked.  
"Please, isn't there something I can do?" I was definitely not a nurse. "You shouldn't be here. You'll catch this thing. But if you want to go up there for a few minutes I'm sure he'll appreciate seeing you." Mr. Mellark said.  
"Hey Peeta," I said as I walked into his room. He looked pretty awful honestly. His face was red and he looked so pale other places and he just looked sick. "Katniss," he croaked. "Why are you here?"  
"Had to check on you," I replied.  
"The act is over. Why do you care?" he replied. I realized he must have seen Madge's post. Did he think I cared that little about him? Yeah, he probably did. I had never indicated that he was anything but a means to an end. No wonder he was upset. I hadn't been a very good friend.  
"Of course I care. You're my friend. And we have to talk when you're better. My mom got some chicken soup." I opened the window to let in a little fresh air.  
"Ok," he said wearily. "Remember we're madly in love. Feel free to kiss me anytime." I laughed. He was quoting that stupid movie we watched a few weeks before. That dystopian young adult movie where the hero said those exact words.  
"Hmm not right now. I don't want to catch your germs." I went home feeling a little better.  
Once Peeta and I talked I felt sure I could resolve the differences between us. But it was almost two weeks until I saw him again. I caught his flu and spent the next week coughing and shivering under the covers and regretting coming to see him. I didn't want to talk to him at school. There were way too many people around. So I asked him to meet me after school at the lake.  
I sat there nervously trying to think up something to say. Hey Peeta, I want you to be my boyfriend for real. Sorry for fake dating you almost three months to get another guy. No, that sounded crazy. I looked like a ditzy girl who didn't know her own mind.  
"Hey Katniss," Peeta stood before me with a smile but it didn't seem like a genuine one. I noticed his eyes still looked sad.  
"Hey," I replied. My brain was stuck in a panic loop. I wasn't sure what to say.  
"I just want to know I'm not blaming you. I mean you were nothing but honest about this whole thing. I was the stupid one who thought things might be changing. I know Gale's like most girls dream and I can't compete. I'm just sorry things didn't work out for you." Peeta sat down beside me on the picnic bench. I blinked, not sure how to respond. Peeta honest thought he wasn't able to compete with Gale. He was popular, handsome and just so charming.  
"That's not true. You're like the most popular person at school. Everyone likes you."  
"Yeah, well, believe it or not being popular doesn't make you hot." Peeta shook his head sadly.  
"Now stop that right now. Stop with the nice guy so girls don't like me bull shit." I glared at him for a second. "I think you're hot. And sweet and basically the best boyfriend a girl could have. Fake or otherwise. It's kinda terrifying. You brought not just flowers for me but also ones for my mom and sister. Prim is still raving about it and my mom basically signed my future away."  
"Katniss, I really appreciate the pep talk but…"  
"But what?"  
"I like you for real. It's not a game for me. It never was. And I know you have feelings for someone else. I get that. I can't pretend anymore, though." Peeta flushed and looked away.  
"And I was so blind. I didn't see what was right in front of me. I was so focused on what I thought I wanted I didn't notice what I did want."  
"And what did you want?"  
"You," He tried arguing with me but I wrapped myself around him and continued, "I want what we had before. But this time for real."  
His eyes brightened and I smiled. I then dove in and pressed my mouth against his. I had missed kissing him. It felt so good to have his arms around me anchoring me in place and feel the warmth flowing through my veins again.  
"You like me, real or not real?" he asked as we pulled away for breath.  
I leaned in again and murmured in his ear, "Real."


End file.
